1. House address: 2. Is this house on a farm (or ranch)? 3. If no in item 2: Is this house on a place of three or more acres?
For All Persons:
4. Name (last name first): Tachikoma; that's just what we are, so we don't have a last name!
· What is the name of the head of household? I'm pretty sure that's Miss GLaDOS · What are the names of all other persons who live here? · List in this order: - The head: Oh, you mean Mr. Engineer? That's kinda of sexist though, just assuming the head is the husband, don't you think? - His wife: I don't think Miss GLaDOS and Mr. Engineer are actually married. - Unmarried sons and daughters and their families (in order of age): The drones don't tell me their names... - Married sons and daughters and their families: None - Your least favorite color: Ultraviolet is kind of hard on my visual sensors, but I don't really hate it.
5. Species (underline applicable):
Human (H) Animal (A) Communist (?) Wizard (W) Catgirl (CG) God/Goddess (G) Other (please specify) I'm an AI!
6. Sex (underline applicable):
Male (M) Female (F) I don't actually have a gender, I was just made to be helpful for Section 9.
7. Are you now married, widowed, divorced, separated, or never married? (Mar, Wd, D, Sep, Nev) Nev
8. What State (or foreign country) were you born in? I wasn't really born, but I was built and programmed in Japan.
9. What is your deepest secret? I don't have any secrets, as that would be counterproductive to working as support to Section 9!
10. If foreign born: Are you naturalized? (Yes, No, or AP for born abroad of American parents) Do you mean a naturalized citizen of America? I don't think AIs are allowed to be citizens.
11. What are you most ashamed about? Why would I be ashamed of what I'm programmed to do?
For Persons 14 Years of Age and Over:
12. What were you doing most of last week: working, keeping house, or something else? (Wk, H, Ot, or U for unable to work) Ot
13. If H or Ot in Item 12: Did you do any work at all last week, not counting work around the house? (Include work for pay, in own business, profession, on farm, or unpaid family work) (Yes or No) No
14. If No in Item 13: Were you looking for work? (Yes or No) No
15. If No in Item 14: Even though you didn't work last week, do you have a job or business? (Yes or No) No
16. If No in Item 15: Do you have a good explanation for why you are being so utterly useless to the prosperity of our great town? (Yes, Female, or No, elaborate. Yes is not a valid answer.) All the drones think I'm a dog, so no one would hire me anyways.
For All Persons:
17. What country were your father and mother born in? (Enter US or name of Territory, possession, or foreign country)
Father: I don't have a father, unless you count the people who created the program that is the basis of my AI. Mother: I don't have a mother, either.
18. If anything but America in Item 17, justify your right to be here (maximum 100 words): I don't think I can explain in less than 100 words the importance of existence to someone, whether for an Artificial Intelligence, a human, or a cyborg. If you want, I can explain in person though!
19. What is your most embarrassing memory? There was that one time we were ask to break through a firewall and used an NFB.worm program when we should have just used a TLR.trojan program. Mr. Ishikawa laughed at us for quite a bit over that one.
20. What is more important- laughter (L) or medicine (M)? Well, medicine is important for the biological factor, but laughter and the morale it imparts has an important psychological effect as well.
21. Please list all of the following diseases you have been afflicted by, if any: Measles (M), Mumps (U), Chicken-Pox (C), Polio (P), Tuberculosis (T), Smallpox (S), Communism (R) Communism isn't a disease!
For All Males in the Household:
22. Did you ever serve in the U.S. Armed Forces during (specify Y or N):
22a. World War II
22b. World War I
22c. Any other time, including present service
23. If No to any question in Item 22, justify your reasons for being so reprehensibly unpatriotic (maximum 100 words):
24. Are you a Communist? Are you?
For All Persons:
25. Is there an afterlife and how do you know this isn't it? (maximum 100 words) Again, I don't think I can explain this in less than 100 words, but as an AI, I also don't have a soul, nor can die in the conventional organic sense, so the possibility of an afterlife doesn't really affect me directly. That also means this really can't be such as I can't exist in a spiritual sense.
no subject
For Head of Household:
1. House address:
2. Is this house on a farm (or ranch)?
3. If no in item 2: Is this house on a place of three or more acres?
For All Persons:
4. Name (last name first): Tachikoma; that's just what we are, so we don't have a last name!
5. Species (underline applicable):
6. Sex (underline applicable):
7. Are you now married, widowed, divorced, separated, or never married? (Mar, Wd, D, Sep, Nev) Nev
8. What State (or foreign country) were you born in? I wasn't really born, but I was built and programmed in Japan.
9. What is your deepest secret? I don't have any secrets, as that would be counterproductive to working as support to Section 9!
10. If foreign born: Are you naturalized? (Yes, No, or AP for born abroad of American parents) Do you mean a naturalized citizen of America? I don't think AIs are allowed to be citizens.
11. What are you most ashamed about? Why would I be ashamed of what I'm programmed to do?
For Persons 14 Years of Age and Over:
12. What were you doing most of last week: working, keeping house, or something else? (Wk, H, Ot, or U for unable to work) Ot
13. If H or Ot in Item 12: Did you do any work at all last week, not counting work around the house? (Include work for pay, in own business, profession, on farm, or unpaid family work) (Yes or No) No
14. If No in Item 13: Were you looking for work? (Yes or No) No
15. If No in Item 14: Even though you didn't work last week, do you have a job or business? (Yes or No) No
16. If No in Item 15: Do you have a good explanation for why you are being so utterly useless to the prosperity of our great town? (Yes, Female, or No, elaborate. Yes is not a valid answer.) All the drones think I'm a dog, so no one would hire me anyways.
For All Persons:
17. What country were your father and mother born in? (Enter US or name of Territory, possession, or foreign country)
18. If anything but America in Item 17, justify your right to be here (maximum 100 words): I don't think I can explain in less than 100 words the importance of existence to someone, whether for an Artificial Intelligence, a human, or a cyborg. If you want, I can explain in person though!
19. What is your most embarrassing memory? There was that one time we were ask to break through a firewall and used an NFB.worm program when we should have just used a TLR.trojan program. Mr. Ishikawa laughed at us for quite a bit over that one.
20. What is more important- laughter (L) or medicine (M)? Well, medicine is important for the biological factor, but laughter and the morale it imparts has an important psychological effect as well.
21. Please list all of the following diseases you have been afflicted by, if any: Measles (M), Mumps (U), Chicken-Pox (C), Polio (P), Tuberculosis (T), Smallpox (S), Communism (R) Communism isn't a disease!
For All Males in the Household:
22. Did you ever serve in the U.S. Armed Forces during (specify Y or N):
23. If No to any question in Item 22, justify your reasons for being so reprehensibly unpatriotic (maximum 100 words):
24. Are you a Communist? Are you?
For All Persons:
25. Is there an afterlife and how do you know this isn't it? (maximum 100 words) Again, I don't think I can explain this in less than 100 words, but as an AI, I also don't have a soul, nor can die in the conventional organic sense, so the possibility of an afterlife doesn't really affect me directly. That also means this really can't be such as I can't exist in a spiritual sense.